Archive for January, 2010
Wallowing in the Muck
The Law of Attraction. Positive Thinking. Sharing the love and shining the light. All wonderful, powerful and uplifting thoughts. But what about those days when you get out of bed crabby and no matter what you do, you just can’t shake that feeling? My spiritual journey has been one of awakening – opening my eyes to the power I have to create my experience. I accept, believe and own that mantle of responsibility. Even still, some things catch me off guard. Yesterday was one of those days.
I even know what triggered the mood. My son broke a brand new digital camera. He didn’t apologize. He didn’t even completely own that he broke it. He dropped it and his assessment was that “it’s possible that it’s my fault.” Ya think?!
My husband became furious, but he completely bottled it up. Being near him felt a little like sitting on a volcano and wondering when it was going to erupt. This bottled anger found a release when he started lamenting about our financial situation, a frustrating and overwhelming topic – one with no quick or easy answers.
So I got stuck! I felt frustrated by my son’s carelessness and my husband’s decision to not make my son replace the broken camera with his own money. I sunk deeper into the muck as I considered that he didn’t support my desire to allow natural consequences teach my son what could be a valuable lesson. Not only that, but since I used my credit card points to buy the camera in the first place, I felt like it was my loss by not having the camera replaced. Heck, I could have spent those points on something I wanted rather than on something for the kids or the family. The muck just got deeper.
Wallowing in this frustration, unable to shift to a more loving and better feeling place, I brought up more things to feel frustrated about. I thought of the friend who apparently only needs me when something in her life seems broken. The muck got deeper.
I tried to step out of it and away from it by shopping. That didn’t really help. I took the dogs for a long walk. The fresh air and exercise let in glimpses of a better feeling place, but they didn’t completely chase the blues away.
Music. Reaching out to friends. A good night’s sleep. More music. Caring comments from loving friends. And today the muck is mostly gone.
It’s tough though, I’ll tell you, to reach for that higher feeling place when the muck is sucking at your feet, holding you firmly in place. Sometimes we just have to acknowledge that “Yes, Indeed, we’re stuck in the muck!”
I think it helps to be kind when we find ourselves stuck like this. Certainly, berating ourselves for feeling what we are or giving ourselves messages that we “should” be feeling something else only adds power to the hold that the muck already has. Some days, we just need to allow ourselves to experience whatever it is that we find ourselves feeling.
I’ll be the first to admit that wallowing in the muck with feelings of frustration, inadequacy and angst is not a fun place to be. However, aren’t these feelings too part of our human experience? To deny part of our nature tends to negate the rest of it too. So rather than deny – allow. Sometimes the quickest way past something is forging straight through it.
Once on the other side – in an hour, a day or a couple days – we can look back to see what gift this experience offers us. It’s always there – some reason to be grateful that we allowed ourselves time to just be in the muck. What gift did you find?
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 3 so far )Eyes Open Wide
Today ushers in a brand new year, full of possibilities and potentialities. What will you do with it? What will you allow to hold you back from grabbing onto your dreams?
I’ve never been big on New Year’s Resolutions, but this year I’m going to make resolutions – set mindful intentions for making my dreams a reality in 2010. I’m going to make plans to create a financially abundant year so that I’m free to pursue greater education in the healing arts. What do you want to accomplish this year?
We DO have a choice, you know. We can actively create our lives – filled with magical moments, clarity of purpose and vision, and strategic action. We can move in alignment with our Soul’s purpose where Life flows freely, effortlessly, easily. Or we can resist – and find discord, dissonance and frustration. I for one choose to always seek my path, following the direction of my heart and the knowing of my soul. I choose to walk with my eyes open wide – open to the possibilities that God will give to me.
Will you walk with me this year? Together we can uncover the mysteries of our souls, find the passion of our hearts and uncover the desires of our lives. Together, we WILL create the life we crave.
This year I choose to meet Life as my playground, limited ONLY by my creative vision. I choose to see Life’s possibilities all around me. I choose to embrace Life fully and face it openly and honestly.
I choose to walk with my eyes open wide.
Won’t you join me?
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