Archive for December, 2014

Figuring it out as we go…

Posted on December 22, 2014. Filed under: Spiritual Practice | Tags: , , , , , , , |

Life is a process.  Each experience leads to another, to the next.  For better or for worse, we can only take one step at a time, whether that feels like a forward step or a backward step.  We just keep racking up experience after experience.  And we hope that we are going somewhere – somewhere that feels good, that feels fulfilling.

We made assessments about life at a very early age.  We made determinations about our worth, our value, about success and failure – long before we fully understood the depth of meaning of those concepts.  Then we spend our lives marching to the tune of those beliefs acquired long before we had the power to choose deliberately and consciously.  We were subjected to customs, traditions, duties and obligations – and those things became the fabric of the tapestry of How We View Life.

At some point, most of us wake up to the fact that we can actually examine and discard those beliefs that feel like vices around our very lifeblood – those things that choke the hope, joy and love out of our existence.  You know the ones I’m talking about – those things like, “You’re a worthless piece of ^%*$,” or “You don’t deserve to be happy,” or “It’s all your fault.”  Pick your poison.  We’re all carrying some version of it around inside of us.

The way I now see it, the path to happiness lies in exposing these false beliefs that underlie the very Each experiencefoundation of who we see ourselves to be.  They impact everything.  Every relationship.  Every interaction.  Every choice.  We’re either proving to ourselves that they’re true, and we are worthless – or we’re faced with the realization that the very foundation of what we’ve built our identity upon is cracked, damaged and in dire need of rebuilding.

So that brings me back to my initial comment – Life is a process.  I said that to a friend today, and he thought he heard me say, Life is a crock.  Perhaps that’s really what I was saying.  Sometimes the process just plain sucks.  It can be hard.  But only – and I mean ONLY – because somewhere along the line we’ve deemed it so.

See, we came in with a clean slate.  We entered this life knowing that we are divine creators, still basking in the loving oneness that precedes and supersedes life as we consciously know it.  And then we forgot.  We forgot that we come from love and that the point is and has always been simply experiencing and expressing this love in an infinite variety of ways.  Somewhere along the line we messed it all up by coming to believe that we are anything less than who we were when we began this journey as little tiny infants.  We created limiting beliefs … and now we’re on the journey of exposing them for the falsehoods that they are, one by stinking one.

Gradually we begin to reassemble the pieces of the puzzle into their proper places.  We begin to see ourselves as the powerful creators of our experience that we always have been, but which we were taught to diminish and discount, belittle and bemoan.  When we take responsibility for our lives, we see that each experience is one more piece of the puzzle reassembling our divine birthright which is to know that love is all there is.  Everything else is illusion.

So while it is true that sometimes the process stinks, it does lead us to the magnificent revelation and understanding of our divine connection to all things.  As humans, we’re all just figuring it out as we go.  And nothing could be more perfect than that.

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The illusion is that someone else put up the fences – when it’s been our doing all along.

Posted on December 9, 2014. Filed under: Spiritual Practice | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , |

The illusion is that someone else put up the fencesWe want to hold someone else responsible for the fences we run into. We want to blame them for putting up these barriers – when in reality, any barriers we encounter are always of our own making.

I know that is a hard pill to swallow. “How can that possibly be? Why would I put up fences to hold me back? So-and-so is the one that made me mad or is being a jerk or …” or whatever story we tell that shifts the focus from our own thoughts and beliefs that are really responsible for creating the feeling state that we’re in. And try as we might, that responsibility falls squarely on us.

I understand. I get it. Life happens. Things break. Kids make poor choices. People act crabby or get depressed. We have disappointments. But in ALL of these things, it is up to us alone to CHOOSE how to respond, how to feel and then how to act. We can let our inner dialogue convince us that we’re powerless, that someone else is at fault – which again just puts us in that victim stance of powerlessness – or we can recognize our power to pause that inner conversation and shift it.

I’m not saying this is easily done. Hardly! There are so few role models for this. It is certainly NOT what most of us have been taught. We have no idea what this looks like – but THAT is no excuse for not making the effort, for not choosing to stop self-defeating self-talk, for not interrupting the “automatic” knee-jerk reactions we’re used to employing by default.

Pause. Breathe. Ask yourself, “What is appropriate for me right now?” Or “What good in this situation am I not seeing?” It’s solely up to us to change these patterns which no longer serve us.

And sometimes… it’s best to just lay low, curl up with a book, and wait for another day to try again.

Whatever you choose, own it. Be okay with it. Know that somehow all of this is leading to a better tomorrow – once we quit banging against those fences that we think are holding us back.

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